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Why is it so hard to be honest with a therapist?
Someone might worry that a therapist will judge them if they acknowledge a mistake they made. Or they might fear the therapist will think they’re a bad person or “crazy” for telling a story about how they lost their temper. So it might feel safer to reveal the things that make them look good. When working with a therapist, one of the first things they will pick up on is your body language. People use their bodies to tell stories, and when there are inconsistencies in their stories or if they are not truthful, body language is a good way to pick up on those cues. What can I tell my therapist? The short answer is that you can tell your therapist anything – and they hope that you do. It’s a good idea to share as much as possible, because that’s the only way they can help you. Give yourself some time to develop a sense of trust in your therapist before you disclose anything that feels too private. Also, as you move through the process, don’t be afraid to continue talking about any feeling you might have around trust between you and your therapist. There are a few things that might contribute to this: you may not have developed the level of trust you need to feel safe with the therapist you are working with, you may be fearful of being judged by the therapist, or maybe you are afraid that opening the pain of the past might be too much to handle. Most therapists will not judge you, says Peter Cellarius, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Los Gatos, California. If they do — after all, they’re human — a good therapist will not let feelings of judgment get in the way of helping you.
Do you have to be completely honest with a therapist?
Therapists & counsellors expect trust in the sense that both parties understand and are committed to spend every session building it. The most critical component of trust is honesty, so consider being upfront about the fact that you do not trust a therapist 100% with certain information to be good practice at honesty. Why you should tell the truth. If clients don’t let therapists know that something isn’t working—that the therapist is too talkative, perhaps, or that they don’t feel supported—therapy will stall, you’ll get resentful, or you’ll decide it isn’t working and quit. A good therapist will welcome your feedback. There are a few situations that may require a therapist to break confidentiality: If the client may be an immediate danger to themself or another. If the client is endangering another who cannot protect themself, as in the case of a child, a person with a disability, or elder abuse. Yes, it’s more likely that therapy will do good than harm. But the dark secret in the mental health world is that therapy can cause harm. People who’ve been to a bad therapist can tell you: bad therapy is worse than no therapy at all. A bad therapist can shut down your healing process instead of helping it along.
Should I be 100% honest with my therapist?
Therapists & counsellors expect trust in the sense that both parties understand and are committed to spend every session building it. The most critical component of trust is honesty, so consider being upfront about the fact that you do not trust a therapist 100% with certain information to be good practice at honesty. Psychotherapy is, for the most part, confidential. Patients of mental health providers like psychiatrists, psychologists, and social workers reasonably expect that their in-therapy disclosures will remain private. Your therapist’s relationship with you exists between sessions, even if you don’t communicate with each other. She thinks of your conversations, as well, continuing to reflect on key moments as the week unfolds. She may even reconsider an opinion she had or an intervention she made during a session. We walk a fine line of being on your side but making sure that you are grounded and can maintain proper boundaries. So yes, we as therapists do talk about our clients (clinically) and we do miss our clients because we have entered into this field because we remain hopeful for others. The therapist will ask questions about your presenting concerns, as well as your history and background. Most likely, you’ll find yourself talking about your current symptoms or struggles, as well saying a bit about your relationships, your interests, your strengths, and your goals. Yes. We care. If you feel genuinely cared for by your therapist, it’s real. It’s too hard to fake that.
Why do I feel like Im lying to my therapist?
Dishonesty in therapy happens for many of the reasons it happens in daily life: to protect yourself or someone you love, avoid embarrassment or criticism, or leave a good impression. Maybe you: feel ashamed of your habits, emotions, fantasies, relationships, or sexual behaviors. Psychotherapy is not supposed to be like a regular conversation. Over-talking, whether therapists are talking about you or—even worse—themselves, is one of the most common therapeutic blunders. Guilt is regularly expressed by many therapists. I feel guilty for turning away clients when I’m fully booked. I feel guilty that I don’t want to reduce this client’s fee or bulk bill. I feel guilty that I can’t offer my client the times they want. Back to Fictional Reader’s question about why it may be difficult to look a therapist in the eyes. Some possible root causes range from guilt, shame, anxiety, low self-esteem, shyness, past abuse, depression or autistic spectrum disorders to varying cultural norms and cognitive overload.
Can I tell my therapist the truth?
There are four people you should never lie to—your doctor, your accountant, your lawyer, and your therapist. You’re paying these professionals for their expertise. They can’t help you if they don’t know the whole story. But as a therapist, I know a lot of people don’t tell me the truth. What can I tell my therapist? The short answer is that you can tell your therapist anything – and they hope that you do. It’s a good idea to share as much as possible, because that’s the only way they can help you. Is Therapy Confidential? In almost every instance, therapy is absolutely confidential. You therapist is required to maintain confidentiality about everything said in sessions between the two of you, just like a doctor is required to keep your records private. You have specific rights when disclosing your diagnosis as a client receiving therapy. For example, it’s your right to ask your therapist to tell you if they believe you have a mental health condition. If you want a diagnosis, you can ask your therapist upfront. Individuals fear judgment, change, the unknown, and what they might discover in therapy; additionally, they’re too prideful to admit they need help. Additionally, some people doubt the efficacy of mental health treatment: They’re uncertain it will work or misunderstand how it works.