Table of Contents
Do therapists genuinely care?
Yes. We care. If you feel genuinely cared for by your therapist, it’s real. It’s too hard to fake that. The short answer is that you can tell your therapist anything – and they hope that you do. It’s a good idea to share as much as possible, because that’s the only way they can help you. Therapists don’t feel only love for their clients. Therapists love their clients in various ways, at various times. And yes, I’m sure there are some therapists out there who never love their clients. But, a lot more than we might think or recognise, love is around in the therapy relationship. We walk a fine line of being on your side but making sure that you are grounded and can maintain proper boundaries. So yes, we as therapists do talk about our clients (clinically) and we do miss our clients because we have entered into this field because we remain hopeful for others. Your therapist’s relationship with you exists between sessions, even if you don’t communicate with each other. She thinks of your conversations, as well, continuing to reflect on key moments as the week unfolds. She may even reconsider an opinion she had or an intervention she made during a session.
Do therapists pretend to care?
Although there’s nothing wrong with showing concern or compassion, therapists don’t operationalize these aspects to help their clients. In effect, caring can be detrimental to the client-therapist relationship. For example, it may cause attachment, overdependence, or even the development of romantic feelings. It’s not uncommon for therapists to have feelings for clients, and vice versa—call it transference, countertransference, or something else. But we have to remember that it’s the therapist’s job to meet the client’s therapeutic needs and goals, not the therapist’s own personal or professional wants and needs. When a therapist becomes dismissive, defensive, disrespectful, or argumentative when you question what they say, they are bad. Therapists must model healthy relationships and objectively listen to what is being said to them. Dismissive behaviors cause people to question themselves and can lower self esteem. Most therapists will not judge you, says Peter Cellarius, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Los Gatos, California. If they do — after all, they’re human — a good therapist will not let feelings of judgment get in the way of helping you.
Do therapists have clients they don’t like?
Although therapists might not like to admit it, there are times when you don’t click with particular clients—or worse, you just don’t like them. Perhaps the person is overly critical or negative, or you find your personalities are not a good match. Distrust of psychotherapists is more common than you might think. It is also a primary reason that prevents many people who need professional counseling from seeking help. Moreover, many clients who go to a therapist may prematurely drop out of treatment because they do not trust the therapist. Therapist burnout is a phenomenon in which therapists feel emotionally exhausted with a lack of enthusiasm for their work. They report that it takes a great deal of effort to do their job and maintain healthy boundaries with clients, and many feel there isn’t enough time in their schedule to complete all their work. Therapists’ Feelings and Behaviors Toward Clients Most therapists (71 percent) said they, either sometimes or regularly, found a client sexually attractive. Approximately 23 percent had fantasized about being in a romantic relationship and 27 percent about having sexual contact with a patient. Reasons people fall in love with their therapist Waichler explains, “The therapeutic relationship between patient and therapist is an intimate one.” Strong feelings and emotions are involved in therapy so it’s not surprising many people develop romantic feelings for their therapist. Guilt is regularly expressed by many therapists. I feel guilty for turning away clients when I’m fully booked. I feel guilty that I don’t want to reduce this client’s fee or bulk bill. I feel guilty that I can’t offer my client the times they want.
Do therapists feel guilty?
Guilt is regularly expressed by many therapists. I feel guilty for turning away clients when I’m fully booked. I feel guilty that I don’t want to reduce this client’s fee or bulk bill. I feel guilty that I can’t offer my client the times they want.
Do therapists get emotionally attached?
So clients often have feelings for their therapists that are like the ones that children have towards their parents. Sometimes it feels like falling in love. Transference is completely natural and normal, and it can enhance the experience of therapy significantly. The average number of clients per therapist varies. Seeing more than six psychotherapy clients a day (in my mind) is a recipe for therapist burnout. When a client who is usually verbal begins to fall silent while talking about something difficult, corresponding silence by the therapist is often helpful and supportive. It may convey attention and interest, as well as the therapist’s commitment to not interfere with the client’s need to process what is going on. Research shows a generally high job satisfaction among the profession, but everyone can have bad days. Counseling is an emotionally taxing job and sometimes the clients’ problems can hit too close to home. With adequate self-care, however, counselors are happy (and happy to help). Therapists & counsellors expect trust in the sense that both parties understand and are committed to spend every session building it. The most critical component of trust is honesty, so consider being upfront about the fact that you do not trust a therapist 100% with certain information to be good practice at honesty.
Do therapists do more harm than good?
Yes, it’s more likely that therapy will do good than harm. But the dark secret in the mental health world is that therapy can cause harm. People who’ve been to a bad therapist can tell you: bad therapy is worse than no therapy at all. A bad therapist can shut down your healing process instead of helping it along. Anywhere from 50 to 75 percent of people who go to therapy report some benefit—but at least 5 percent of clients get worse as a result of treatment. (For people from marginalized groups, harmful outcomes may be even more common.) Knowing that you can say anything to your therapist and it will remain in the room helps you feel safe and builds trust between you and the therapist. For this reason, all therapists are legally and ethically bound to keep their sessions confidential and not share with anyone else what was talked about. Client-therapist friendships can be unethical, according to codes of ethics from many bodies that govern therapists, including the American Psychological Association [APA]. By becoming friends with a client, a therapist can risk disciplinary action from governing bodies or losing licensure.
Do therapists ever hug their clients?
A therapist can hug a client if they think it may be productive to the treatment. A therapist initiating a hug in therapy depends on your therapist’s ethics, values, and assessment of whether an individual client feels it will help them. None of the ethics boards that regulate mental health professionals specifically prohibit the use of touch or view it as unethical. There are times when your therapist may believe that it’s more harmful to you not to initiate a hug. In some cases, nonsexual, therapeutic touch may be beneficial. Therapists don’t feel only love for their clients. Therapists love their clients in various ways, at various times. And yes, I’m sure there are some therapists out there who never love their clients. But, a lot more than we might think or recognise, love is around in the therapy relationship. So clients often have feelings for their therapists that are like the ones that children have towards their parents. Sometimes it feels like falling in love. Transference is completely natural and normal, and it can enhance the experience of therapy significantly. A study found out that 81 percent of the studied psychologists had a diagnosable psychiatric disorder. Therapists are known as wounded healers. The most common question asked by patients is if the therapist has undergone a therapeutic experience.
Do therapists get frustrated with clients?
Therapists do get frustrated with clients from time to time, but some can handle difficult clients better than others. This may be due to training or inherent personality traits. But in reality, all counselors experience discomfort with and dislike of a client at some point in their careers, says Keith Myers, an LPC and ACA member in the Atlanta metro area. “If someone tells you that it does not [happen], they’re not being honest with themselves,” he says. Research shows a generally high job satisfaction among the profession, but everyone can have bad days. Counseling is an emotionally taxing job and sometimes the clients’ problems can hit too close to home. With adequate self-care, however, counselors are happy (and happy to help). Therapists may take patients’ nonverbal signs of distress as a cue to change topics, but this may be at the peril of the treatment. Therapists must monitor their own body language so as not to convey discomfort or disinterest, which may keep patients from sharing. Findings revealed that therapists have strong emotional and behavioral responses to a patient’s dissociation in session, which include anxiety, feelings of aloneness, retreat into one’s own subjectivity and alternating patterns of hyperarousal and mutual dissociation. Client-therapist friendships can be unethical, according to codes of ethics from many bodies that govern therapists, including the American Psychological Association [APA]. By becoming friends with a client, a therapist can risk disciplinary action from governing bodies or losing licensure.